Usually my blog posts are rather jovial and fun (it's one of my signature strengths as you can read). This doesn't mean my life doesn't hold pain or sadness, 'cause it does. I just don't share it, at least not always.

Have you ever had a day where you have a sort of a surreal moment and think, "wait, what am I doing? what's the purpose of life? what am I doing all of this for?" I thought that today. This doesn't mean I'm confused or not following Jesus, so before you go and think some weird thoughts about me, stop. Be real with yourself - I'm sure you have them too. I think sometimes I just focus so much inward that I forget the big picture. Someone once wrote me a letter and said, "Keep the end in sight always, that way you can take everything in stride." Makes sense to me. Gotta keep my eye on the prize or else I can forget the what and the why.

Today was definitely an "off" day. I didn't really feel like being around people but at the same time I was terribly lonely. How that works itself out, I'm not sure. I hate days like this. I just feel terrible. I think I woke up with this predisposition. I had a horrible dream and I awoke feeling rather confused and angry. [does this happen to anyone else?] I'm a freak.

Well I'm glad this day is over. Tomorrow is a new day.

Actually, You are the new day:

1 Comment

  1. Jessica Chen on Sunday, July 13, 2008 at 10:52:00 PM EDT

    You're most definitely not a freak =). And thank God for new days. I used to get those days a lot Steph =)...a lot of them had no good reason really. Not even a weird dream to spark it. That's not to say that I'm lonely a lot or whatnot...I just used to be a VERY introspective person (it is a sinful characteristic of mine that does manifest itself without the help of the Holy Spirit). I still get those days but they're not as bad...and it's mostly because I've been learning that the only thing that gets me through those days (when I feel the most earthly) is focusing on heavenly things...you get what I mean? =)

    Anyways, I also wanted to say thank you for introducing those hilarious shows (Wipeout and that mock-japanese game show) to me =). They're hilariously entertaining and I enjoy them (and your blog) a whole lot =D. I love the joy you have in living life. It's refreshing to read =).